I blinked and somehow we're already two months into life with Leo.
We've come a long way since the first two weeks and I really wanted to get my thoughts on paper (err....well, here) before I blink again and forget them all.
He is such a good baby....and I'll get all of his really adorable traits written down on his two month post...but I think we truly hit the jackpot with this guy. He's easy to please and goes with the flow. It's nice now too, I started to learn how to read (for the most part) what he needs, and I try to stay ahead of that as much as possible. We are following Moms on Call and it's worked really well for us. This week we are transitioning to the 8-16 week schedule which is throwing us a little off, but I'm hoping in a week or so we'll be back in a great groove.
The first month for me was hard. Not so much physically, but mentally and emotionally I struggled. On top of just normal, yet out of control hormone swings, I had a really hard time coping with my anxiety. For weeks I lived in this scary, terrified place that was all encompassing. My anxiety buzzed through my body at all hours of the day. I hid it well, and tried to do things that helped; walks, getting out of the house, socializing, but the fear was still there - and it was overwhelming.
At my six week appointment, I was open with my doctor and we talked about ways to manage my anxiety, and since then....along with the passing of time and getting more familiar with life as a new mom....things have been so, so, so much better.
Breastfeeding, again - after the first two weeks (p.s. are they that hard for everyone??) - has been mostly very enjoyable. Lately, Leo eats every 2-3 hours, and takes his last feeding as a bottle (4 to 4.5oz) that Joel gives him around 8:15/8:30. While Joel is giving him a bottle, I pump to stay on schedule with him, and a few times a week I will pump during his morning nap to try and build our freezer supply.
Leo has been a good sleeper from the get go. In the beginning, he would give us 4 hour stretches at night pretty typically, but over the last few weeks we've made our way to almost 7 hour stretches. After he falls asleep at 9, he seems to be down until 3-4am, and then gets back up between 6:30-7:30. No two days are exactly alike, but I don't think I can complain about lack of sleep compared to some. During the day, Leo gets two long 2-hour naps, and then a few catnaps here and there too.
I sure have a new dumbfounded appreciation of anyone who raises a child alone. I honestly do not know how they do it, and know with certainty that I would crumble without Joel. I don't really like to even say that he is "such a big help', because he isn't "helping" me raise our child. He is just as invested as I am, and truly goes out of his way to make sure that we're both getting breaks and time to do what we need to do without the baby. Not only has he proven himself to be the most amazing dad, he has stepped up as a husband too. I needed Joel more in the last 2 months than I ever had and he's been there for me, and molded to what my ever changing needs every step of the way. We've had plenty of low points where moods and exhaustion and fear made us lash out at each other, but overall, we have emerged the first two months as better friends, spouses, and parents all the way around.
I'm really enjoying not being pregnant, but when I do have another baby, I hope that I can read this post during the first two weeks and have this serve as a reminder that it will get better, a lot better, and such great joy lies ahead.